In my after-hours job, I've been well exposed to many aspects of death and dying, and have become inured to much of this.
During my sleep state, I help people pass over - a lot of that is rescue, but there is more to it. I also help people get born into this world from time to time - joyful here, but sad on the other side of the Veil that divides this world and the next.
As a trance medium, I once estimated the number of people I had channelled (not all dead, and of the dead, not all earthbound), and it is in the hundreds - which is an incredibly rewarding experience, once you get past the hurdle of not being selfish with your own body (and that also requires that you learn how to do this in a safe manner), something that helps give a fantastic variety and depth of insight and empathy and understanding, as you get a glimpse of the life and death experiences of those you are channelling (well, I did - I am too much of a sticky beak in that context to be a deep trance medium, although I occasionally ventured into those deeper waters).
In this world, I've had quite a few friends and people I know die - quite a few relatives (age and cancer), friends (cancer and the results of discrimination), and other people of varying significance (including from drunken bloody idiot drivers). I've also had non-human friends die - pets, including one only a few weeks ago.
It helps that I can communicate with the dead - we usually don't use words, so I tend not to say "talk": it is more a case of sharing emotions, thoughts, aspirations, even. Nevertheless, there has also been considerable earthly emotion to deal with - particularly with the death of my adoptive mother, which led to me taking a fresh look at my life, and making some key changes (she's here now, peering approvingly over my shoulder as I type - Hi, Mum :) ), and the more recent death of my adoptive father.
I've had other emotional matters to deal with as well, some of which have left me traumatised and are still being dealt with, but I've been working as constructively as I can with emotions since I was a kid.
Given all that, I've been caught aback by my response to some bad news last night. When I got home, I found that three members of my extended family had died - one was in her mid-90s, much loved but suffering serious problems, one was still-born, and one was in the "prime of life" range.
None was what most people would describe as close, but they were part of my family - and also, their passing affects those who are very near and dear to me. So maybe the effect on me is partly the effect on those near and dear ones ... maybe it is the timing, between a cat passing and the ten year anniversary of my adoptive mother's passing ... maybe it is the fact that I found out about all three within a few minutes and thus had no recovery or adjustment time ... or maybe it is all of these factors, and perhaps more.
I'm aware that others have also experienced multiple losses, and many more severe than mine - such as the sole survivors of families after the Holocaust, or the families being destroyed in places like Syria, or the families devastated by poverty, gambling, alcoholism, domestic violence, and other social ills.
However, that their suffering is numerically greater does not diminish or delegitimise mine; it does not decrease or lessen my pain; and the thought that others also know this pain it does not give comfort or ease. Pain is pain, and should be healed where it can, endured where it cannot, and prevented wherever reasonably possible.
(there may be limits on this, including for karmic or growth purposes)
Fluffy nonsense about pain shared is pain halved is just that - fluffy nonsense. Yes, it can help to talk to trusted people who know or can support you - rarely, a moment of compassion from a stranger helps, but healing generally is as complex as the pain it is addressing, and sometimes more so. There is an infinite a range of salves, and the right mix varies from person to person, and instance to instance.
In my case, I will sort through the triggers, do the analysis required, and then get on with the healing - and, in my case, one of my salves is easing the pain of those close to me: we are affected by the pain of those close to us, and that is magnified when one is psychic.
We are all linked together in so many ways - links of shared life or experience, links of pain, and links of love. Whatever the links are, they can *always be turned towards love.
* almost
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Remember: we generally need to be more human being rather than human doing, to mind our Mӕgan, and to acknowledge that all misgendering is an act of active transphobia/transmisia that puts trans+ lives at risk & accept that all insistence on the use of “trans” as a descriptor comes with commensurate use of “cis” as a descriptor to prevent “othering” (just as binary gendered [men’s and women’s] sporting teams are either both given the gender descriptor, or neither).Copyright © Kayleen White 2007-2024 NO AI
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